Ghana to Trial Telepathy for Road Tolls Collection; USA, China Taking Notes
Ghana is once again pushing the frontiers of innovation (since the time Kantanka's locally-manufactured missile flew 12 feet), announcing plans to collect road tolls using advanced telepathic technology—an idea reportedly inspired by a low-budget Kumawood sci-fi movie, where road spirits whispered toll amounts into drivers' minds.
The Roads Minister-designate, Kwame Governs Agbodza, assured the public during his vetting that the days of toll booths and impatient trotro drivers haggling over change are over. Under this groundbreaking system, drivers won’t need to stop or roll down their windows; instead, drivers will simply think about their destination, and the system—powered by what officials vaguely described as "technology"—will deduct the money instantly.
Global superpowers are reportedly intrigued by the innovation, with the USA and China rumored to be "taking notes," though it's unclear whether they are impressed or just deeply confused. NASA is said to be eager to understand how Ghana leapfrogged decades of technological research using nothing more than "local innovation and a strong belief in the unseen."
The system will allegedly track road usage through advanced sensors, spiritual consultations, and the occasional neighborhood prophet. "We’re leveraging artificial intelligence," a ministry spokesperson claimed – in what was likely his first time using the buzzword – though details remain scarce. Experts warn, however, that strong-minded individuals may be able to "dodge" payments simply by thinking about something else—like jollof or football.
Public reactions have ranged from excitement to outright skepticism. Others are worried about unintended deductions, especially for those who frequently daydream about road trips they can’t afford. However, the government remains optimistic, promising that Ghana’s road infrastructure will finally see improvements—provided citizens can keep their thoughts focused and their mobile money wallets ready.