Local Men Baffled By Local Women Celebrating International Women's Day

In a stirring International Women’s Day speech, local woman and Vice President Prof. Jane Opoku-Agyemang passionately called for women's empowerment in Ghana. Across the country, an unexpected crisis unfolded as men struggled to understand why local women confidently joined global celebrations meant for, in their opinion, properly international women. “My wife is a local woman known only from Madina to Makola,” grumbled one confused husband, clutching his bowl of fufu while his wife had her ears only for the learned professor.

Drinking spots across the country became makeshift crisis centres, where bewildered men debated the term “international”, arguing it should apply only to those who have at least once crossed the border, suggesting that the terminology might be responsible for Ghana’s slow progress on gender equality. “It’s not that we don’t support them,” argued Kwamena, a taxi driver. “But tell me—how is Auntie Mansa from Kasoa supposed to feel included in International Women’s Day?”

Following conclusion of their meeting, Ghanaian men have assured their full support for women’s empowerment, but with one small request—can their wives at least get passports first? Determined to ensure their wives meet the necessary international standards, some men have begun personally sponsoring passport applications. “If she wants to be an International Woman, let’s do this properly,” said one husband. “We’ll start small—maybe a quick trip to Lome—then work our way up.”

Despite these noble efforts to clarify who exactly qualifies as an International Woman, some women remain unimpressed. “So if I don’t have a Schengen visa, I can’t be empowered?” one trader fired back, lamenting why she got married to a local man, who has never even left Obuasi himself.